Sterling Severns Children's Formation, Rule of Life

Going Deeper: Exploration of Romans 3:1-20 with Your Children

Dear Parents:

Faith conversations with children can be full of wonder and curiosity. This guide is here to help you continue—or start—those conversations with your child about the big ideas we’ve been reflecting on Romans 3:1-20. The goal isn’t to arrive at perfect answers but to encourage your child to ask questions, reflect, and engage creatively. We want these conversations to be a fun and meaningful part of your family’s daily life.

As your family begins to build a “rule of life”—a shared rhythm that makes space for God—remember that this is a journey, not a sprint. You don’t have to use the whole guide at once. Here are some ideas to help spark creativity:

  • Pick just one question to explore this week.
  • Invite your child to respond through drawing or storytelling.
  • Think of a Jesus Follower your child enjoys spending time with. Maybe they can join in a conversation or share their thoughts.

Let’s take this journey one step at a time and enjoy the process!

Key Themes from the Sermon

1. Everyone Makes Mistakes (Romans 3:10)
We all make mistakes, and no one is perfect—that’s something Paul reminds us of in Romans 3. It’s okay to mess up. God knows we aren’t perfect, and He loves us no matter what. The important thing is to be honest when we make mistakes and trust that God will always help us start fresh.

2. God’s Treasure in Us (2 Corinthians 4:7)
Paul says that we carry God’s love like a treasure inside us. Even though we aren’t perfect, we are still very special to God. Like a clay jar with cracks, it’s sometimes through our mistakes that God’s love shines through us. God made us to share His love with the world, even when we don’t feel perfect.

3. We Are Loved Even When We Mess Up (Romans 3:3-4)
Paul also reminds us that when we aren’t faithful, God is still faithful. God’s love doesn’t depend on us getting everything right. Even when we make mistakes, God is always ready to forgive us and love us through it.

Reflection Questions for Children

These questions are meant to be fun, simple, and open-ended. Let your child share their thoughts and ideas. Feel free to add some hands-on activities like drawing or storytelling to make the experience more engaging.

  • God’s Treasure in Us: We learned that God’s love is like a treasure we carry inside us, even though we aren’t perfect. Can you think of something special you love that you’d want to share with a friend? How can you share God’s love with others this week?
    • Activity Idea: Draw a picture of a “clay jar” and talk about what treasures (like love, kindness, or friendship) God has placed in your heart.
  • Missing the Mark: Sin was explained as “missing the mark,” like aiming for something but not hitting it. Can you think of a time you tried to do something right but it didn’t go the way you planned? What did you learn from that? How do you think God feels about you when you make mistakes?
  • Feeling Loved by God: We sang Father Abraham in Sunday school, and it reminds us that we’re all part of God’s family. How does it feel to know you are loved by God, even when you make mistakes? What’s one way you can show someone else that they are loved by God too?
  • Making Mistakes and Being Forgiven: Everyone makes mistakes, and that’s okay! Can you think of a time when you made a mistake and someone forgave you? How did that feel? Remember, God forgives us too, and He helps us start fresh every time.

Spiritual Practice: Create a “Treasure Jar”

This week’s practice is hands-on and creative, designed to help children understand that they carry God’s love, even when they don’t feel perfect.

How to Do It:

  • Get a simple jar (or make one from paper) and label it “Treasure Jar.”
  • Throughout the week, encourage your child to put slips of paper in the jar with one thing they’ve done to show God’s love to others. It could be sharing a toy, helping a friend, or saying something kind.
  • At the end of the week, open the jar together and celebrate all the ways God’s love has shone through them.
  • Finish with a simple prayer: “God, thank you for helping us share your love with others. Even when we make mistakes, we know your love is always with us.”

Conclusion

Remember, these conversations are meant to be enjoyable and part of your family’s growing rhythm. Take it slow—there’s no need to rush through all the questions or activities at once. The important thing is creating space for your child to reflect and express their faith in their own way. As you build this “rule of life” together, celebrate the small moments and enjoy the journey.

Additional Reflection Guides on Romans 3:1-20

Going Deeper: Exploration of Romans 3:1-20 with your Teen
Adult Reflection Guide: Romans 3:1-20
Sterling Severns Bible Study, Going Deeper, Romans, Paul's letter to, Staff, Worship

Sermon Reflections: The Destructive Power of Judgmentalism

The Destructive Power of Judgmentalism: Romans 2:1-16

Sermon: September 22, 2024

Romans 2:1-16: The Destructive Power of Judgmentalism

Going Deeper

Understanding God’s Judgment and Kindness in Romans 2

In Romans 2, Paul confronts the tendency to judge others while failing to recognize one’s own sins. Theologian Charles H. Talbert points out that Paul is addressing a primarily Jewish audience who might feel superior to Gentiles because of their knowledge of the law. However, Paul makes it clear that knowledge alone does not justify anyone before God. Instead, it’s the transformation of the heart and actions that matters (Smyth & Helwys Bible Commentary: Romans, Charles H. Talbert, p. 52).

Paul’s emphasis on God’s kindness leading to repentance (Romans 2:4) is not a sign of leniency, but an opportunity for change. The kindness of God is meant to transform, not to condone continued disobedience. Talbert describes this kindness as an invitation to a “radical life-change,” where one stops depending on outward observance of the law and instead focuses on a life transformed by God’s love and grace.

Reflection:

  • How do we, like Paul’s audience, sometimes depend on our religious knowledge or practices to justify ourselves?
  • In what ways is God’s kindness inviting you to a deeper transformation?

The Hypocrisy of Judgmentalism

N.T. Wright, in his biography of Paul, explains that Paul’s concern is not just with overt acts of judgment, but with the underlying hypocrisy. For Paul, the real issue is not about who is ‘in’ and who is ‘out,’ but about the state of the heart. Wright emphasizes that God’s judgment is impartial and based on truth, regardless of one’s background or identity (Paul: A Biography, N.T. Wright, p. 189).

Paul’s challenge is to both Jews and Gentiles to move beyond a superficial observance of the law and to embrace the deeper work of the Spirit. He points out that those who judge others are guilty of the same things they condemn. The only path forward is humility and repentance, acknowledging that we all stand in need of God’s mercy.

Reflection:

  • Where in your life do you see a gap between what you say you believe and how you live?
  • How might God be calling you to close that gap?

The Law Written on Our Hearts

A crucial part of Paul’s argument in Romans 2 is that true obedience is a matter of the heart, not just external adherence to the law. A. Katherine Grieb highlights that for Paul, the real ‘circumcision’ is not physical, but spiritual—circumcision of the heart (Romans: A Theological Commentary on the Bible, A. Katherine Grieb, p. 54). This internal transformation is available to both Jews and Gentiles, making it clear that God’s judgment is based on inner transformation and not just outward compliance.

Grieb explains that this “circumcision of the heart” is an act of the Holy Spirit, transforming believers from the inside out. It represents a new way of belonging to God that transcends ethnic and cultural boundaries. This challenges us to reflect on the ways we might rely on external markers of faith rather than seeking the inward renewal that God desires.

Reflection:

  • In what ways have you relied on external practices or traditions to define your faith?
  • How might God be inviting you to experience a deeper, heart-level transformation?

God’s Transformative Love: Moving Beyond Judgmentalism

Richard Rohr talks about how Paul’s message isn’t just about following rules or judging who’s right and wrong. Instead, it’s about how God’s love invites us to be changed from the inside out. In Romans 2, Paul warns that when we judge others, we’re often blind to our own faults. Rohr reminds us that God isn’t focused on punishing or rewarding us based on our behavior. God wants us to experience a deeper transformation—a change in our hearts that helps us see ourselves and others through the lens of grace (In the Footsteps of St. Paul, Richard Rohr).

Paul is inviting us to stop focusing on what’s wrong with others and, instead, allow God to work within us. This means letting go of our tendency to judge and embracing a new way of living—one that is grounded in love, compassion, and humility. When we do this, we can experience the radical life-change that Paul talks about in Romans 2, where our hearts are transformed and we become more like Christ.

Reflection Questions:

  • How can you allow God’s love to change your perspective on others, especially those you are tempted to judge?
  • In what areas of your life do you sense God inviting you to let go of judgmental attitudes and embrace transformation?
  • How might seeing yourself and others through God’s eyes of grace change the way you interact with people?

The Bigger Picture of God’s Plan

N.T. Wright explains that Paul’s message in Romans isn’t just about individual salvation; it’s part of a much bigger story of God’s plan to renew all creation. He emphasizes that God’s judgment in Romans 2 is not about punishing individuals, but about holding humanity accountable for how we’ve failed to live out our calling as image-bearers of God. God’s purpose has always been to bring about new creation through a transformed people, and this begins with us (Into the Heart of Romans: A Deep Dive into Paul’s Greatest Letter, N.T. Wright, p. 74).

Paul reminds us that judging others distracts us from our own failures to live as God intended. Instead of pointing fingers, we are called to reflect God’s love and grace in the world, participating in the restoration of creation that God envisions. This means recognizing that we are all part of the problem and all invited to be part of the solution through God’s transformative love.

Reflection Questions:

  • How does seeing God’s plan as bigger than individual salvation change the way you read Romans 2?
  • In what ways can you participate in God’s plan for renewal and restoration, starting in your own community?
  • How might embracing your role as an image-bearer of God impact how you treat others, especially those you are tempted to judge?

The Trap of Judgmentalism

In the sermon, we talked about how easy it is to fall into the trap of judging others. Paul warns us in Romans 2:1 that when we judge, we are often condemning ourselves, projecting our own insecurities onto others. Judgmentalism is a form of hypocrisy that isolates us from experiencing God’s grace and truth. Instead of focusing on others’ faults, we are invited to examine our own hearts and seek God’s transformation.

Reflection Questions:

  • Can you think of a time when you judged someone harshly, only to later realize you were struggling with a similar issue? What did God reveal to you in that experience?
  • How does judgmentalism create barriers between you and others? What might it look like to replace judgment with curiosity or compassion?
  • What fears or insecurities might be at the root of your judgmental attitudes? How is God inviting you to address these today?

A Toddler in the Parking Lot: An Illustration of God’s Love

During the sermon, we reflected on a story of a toddler running away from his mother’s hand, unaware of the danger around him. This story illustrates how we often pull away from God’s guidance, thinking we know better. Like a loving parent, God doesn’t force us to stay close but continues to pursue us, ready to guide us back to safety. When we finally choose to stop running, we can take God’s hand and trust in divine guidance, experiencing the true freedom found in walking with God.

Reflection Questions:

  • In what areas of your life have you pulled away from God’s guidance, thinking you knew better? How has that impacted you?
  • How have you experienced God’s loving pursuit, even when you’ve made choices that led you away from divine protection?
  • How can you create space in your life to listen for God’s guidance and respond, especially in areas where you’ve struggled to trust?

The Consequence of Rejecting God’s Love

In the sermon, we discussed how judgmentalism leads to storing up wrath, not as punishment, but as the natural result of rejecting God’s love and grace. It’s like trying to run a car without oil—it simply won’t work as intended. God’s kindness, however, is meant to lead us to repentance, inviting us to let go of judgmentalism and turn back to love.

Reflection Questions:

  • How have you experienced the consequences of judgmentalism in your own life? How has it impacted your relationships with others and with God?
  • What might God be inviting you to repent of today? How can God’s kindness lead you to change your mind and heart?
  • In what ways is God’s love inviting you to move beyond judgmental attitudes and into a deeper experience of God’s grace?

Receiving God’s Love, Loving Ourselves, and Loving Others

We also explored the importance of receiving God’s love for ourselves before we can truly love others. When we accept God’s love, flaws and all, we begin to see ourselves as beloved children of God. This acceptance enables us to love ourselves and, in turn, to love others more authentically and freely, even those who are difficult to love.

Reflection Questions:

  • What practical steps can you take this week to remind yourself of God’s love and extend that same grace to others?
  • What does it mean for you to love yourself as God loves you? How might this self-love change the way you interact with others?
  • Who in your life is difficult to love right now? How might receiving more of God’s love for yourself enable you to love that person more genuinely?

Empathy: The Antidote to Judgmentalism

The sermon highlighted how judgmentalism often stems from our own shame and insecurities. Brene Brown’s insights show us that empathy is the antidote to judgment. By seeing others through the eyes of compassion and understanding their struggles, we can replace judgment with love and connection. This is the kind of transformation that God’s kindness and grace invite us into.

Reflection Questions:

  • Think of someone you’ve judged recently. What might they be struggling with that you haven’t considered? How can you show them empathy this week?
  • Where have you felt judged or misunderstood by others? How has this experience impacted your ability to be empathetic toward them?
  • What is one concrete way you can show empathy to someone you’ve struggled to understand this week?

A Call to Transformation

In summary, the sermon invited us to look inward, to recognize where judgmentalism has taken root, and to allow God to transform us. By receiving God’s love, embracing empathy, and breaking down barriers, we can move beyond judgment and live more fully into the love and grace God offers.

Reflection Questions:

  • What steps can you take to let go of judgmental attitudes and embrace God’s transformative love?
  • How can you actively practice empathy and understanding in your daily interactions?
  • What does it mean for you to participate in God’s healing work in your own life and in the world around you?

Thoughtful Quotations

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you. This is hard. It is perhaps not so hard to forgive a single great injury. But to forgive the incessant provocations of daily life—to keep on forgiving the bossy mother-in-law, the bullying husband, the nagging wife, the selfish daughter, the deceitful son—how can we do it? Only, I think, by remembering where we stand, by meaning our words when we say in our prayers each night, ‘Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us.’”
— C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory

“You didn’t think, did you, that just by pointing your finger at others you would distract God from seeing all your misdoings and from coming down on you hard? Or did you think that because he’s such a nice God, he’d let you off the hook? Better think this one through from the beginning. God is kind, but he’s not soft. In kindness he takes us firmly by the hand and leads us into a radical life-change.”
— Eugene Peterson, The Message, Romans 2:3-4

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”
— Henri Nouwen, Out of Solitude

Sterling Severns Devotionals, Life of the Community, Rule of Life, Rule of Life Together, The Right Next Step

Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom

The past few days have felt heavy. Between the news cycle and the looming presidential debate, it’s hard to ignore the way tension creeps into our hearts. There’s a pressure that builds, a simmering frustration, and it doesn’t take much—a comment from a family member, a dismissive remark in a conversation—for that tension to spill over. I’ve felt it myself. It’s easy to snap back, shut down, or get defensive. These knee-jerk reactions often define us in ways we don’t intend—people may no longer see us as someone willing to listen or seek understanding. When our righteous anger shifts into self-righteousness, we can lose sight of the healing God is calling us to offer the world. But that doesn’t mean we’ve missed our chance. God’s grace meets us, not in perfection but in our efforts to return, pause, and try again. Each pause, no matter how difficult, is an invitation to step back into the work of healing—work we’re never disqualified from, no matter how many times we need to begin again.

This past Sunday, just before the benediction, I encouraged you to join me in practicing the Sacred Pause. It’s the space between what happens to us and how we respond. Lately, I find myself leaning into that space and discovering surprising freedom. When life throws us off balance, the Sacred Pause helps us stop reacting and start responding. As I mentioned, “Sometimes, after the pause, the response might be exactly what you originally wanted to say or do. The difference is that now your response comes from a place of peace and thoughtfulness, not frustration.” In that brief pause, we rediscover the freedom Christ offers us—not just from unhealthy reactions, but from the need to respond impulsively to every situation with anger or fear. Click here to learn how to practice the Sacred Pause.

Many great religious traditions embrace the importance of creating space between action and reaction. In moments when we feel overwhelmed by emotions, finding that space is critical to breaking the cycle of impulsive reactions. This pause allows us to reconnect with God and listen for the guidance of the Holy Spirit. I’ve been inspired by the broader wisdom found in the work of Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, whose profound reflections on human resilience and choice offer insight for anyone navigating difficult emotional experiences. Frankl wrote:

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

Viktor Frankl

Frankl’s words resonate deeply with the Christian practice of the Sacred Pause. It’s in that pause that we make room for the Holy Spirit to guide us, allowing God’s voice to rise above the noise of our emotions. When we slow down and invite God into that space, we can respond not from fear or anger, but from a place centered in love, grace, and wisdom.

This practice reflects the liberation Paul speaks of in his letter to the Romans, where he encourages the early church to live in the freedom of Christ’s love rather than remain bound by division and conflict. And, in those moments where we struggle or fall short, we remember that God’s grace is always present, drawing us back into that space of transformation. Explore how you can incorporate the Sacred Pause into your daily life.

Returning to the World’s Tension

We live in a world brimming with tension, frustration, and conflict. In our own church life, we’ve felt it too—whether it’s during a difficult conversation in a business meeting or while serving in Community Ministry when impatience gets the better of someone. Perhaps you’ve encountered it on the road, stuck behind the guy with the offensive bumper sticker, or while watching a political talk show where contempt seems to be the driving force. These moments test our capacity to live out the love and grace we’re called to embody.

But here’s the good news: we’re growing together. Every time we lean into the Sacred Pause, we take one step closer to healing ourselves and the world around us. The Sacred Pause begins with us—giving God the space to transform our hearts. In that pause, we not only stop our own unhealthy reactions but also make room for others to be seen, heard, and transformed. When people feel understood, they too are invited into their own pause, to reconsider, and begin again. We may not always get it right the first time or even the second, but the love of God, always present and always at work, gives us the space to try again. And as we grow together in our faith, we get to participate in God’s healing project—a project that is grounded in love, grace, and reconciliation.

Together, as a church community, we have the privilege of being instruments of healing in a world that so desperately needs it. Let’s keep growing, keep pausing, and keep discovering the ways God is leading us to love more deeply, to listen more closely, and to heal more faithfully.

Yours in Christ,
Rev. Sterling W. Severns, Pastor

Going Deeper:

God has used many voices to help me grow in my faith, and Arthur Brooks has been one of them. If you’re interested in exploring more about the power of the pause, I encourage you to watch or listen to the conversation between Simon Sinek and Arthur Brooks at the 92nd Street Y, where they discuss the importance of pausing before reacting. You can find the interview here or listen to the podcast here.

John Gottman’s Four Horsemen—criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling—are harmful patterns that damage relationships, often arising when we react out of intense emotions. You can learn more about these patterns here.

Sterling Severns Life of the Community, Rule of Life, Rule of Life Together, Spiritual Disciplines, The Right Next Step

Spiritual Discipline: The Sacred Pause

Morning Reflection: Rediscovering the Freedom to Choose

As described in the article, “Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom”, the Sacred Pause offers us the freedom that Christ gives—not just from unhealthy reactions, but from the need to respond impulsively in anger or fear. Begin your day by reflecting on the freedom found in Christ’s love and the grace available when we pause, listen, and invite God into our responses.

During the Day: Practicing the Sacred Pause

When you feel emotional or overwhelmed, practice the Sacred Pause by following these steps:

  1. Notice the Moment: Acknowledge when strong emotions arise, without rushing to respond.
  2. Pause and Breathe: Take a few deep breaths, giving yourself time to pause. This space helps you avoid reacting impulsively and invites God’s guidance to work through you.
  3. Ask Self-Awareness Questions:
    • What am I feeling right now?
    • Why am I feeling this way? (Is this connected to something deeper, like past experiences or emotions?)
    • What is God trying to show me through this feeling?
    • Is this a moment where I should respond now, or is God calling me to wait?
    • How would God want to respond through me in this situation?
  4. Recognize the Need to Wait: Remember that the Sacred Pause might lead you to wait for the right time to respond. Sometimes, waiting is part of God’s wisdom, allowing you to reflect more deeply before acting. Trust that waiting is an active, spiritual practice that creates space for God to guide you.

Evening Reflection: Journaling and Sharing

At the end of the day, take a few moments to reflect on your experiences with the Sacred Pause and consider these questions:

  1. Did I create space today to pause and respond thoughtfully?
    How did the Sacred Pause free you from reacting impulsively or defensively, as described in the article, “Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom”?
  2. Were there moments when I forgot to pause and reacted out of emotion?
    Reflect on specific moments when you acted without thinking. Was it with a family member, coworker, or someone else? Did your reaction create a chain reaction, escalating tension or misunderstanding? This connects to the article’s message about knee-jerk reactions and their consequences.
  3. How did the Sacred Pause help me rediscover my freedom?
    Did the pause help you break a cycle of frustration? Reflect on the freedom from emotional reactivity that Paul describes in Romans and how this practice brings you closer to that freedom.
  4. What deeper emotions or past experiences might have influenced my reactions?
    Think about moments where your reactions were stronger than expected. Could this be connected to something from your past? This ties into the article’s insight on how deeper emotional or historical baggage can influence our reactions.
  5. In what ways did I experience or offer God’s grace today?
    Reflect on how you received or extended grace during your day. Remember that even when we fail to pause, God’s grace meets us, offering us second chances to begin again.

Hopeful Word on Second Chances

As the article beautifully states, “God’s grace meets us, not in perfection but in our efforts to return, pause, and try again.” Every time we pause, whether we succeed or fall short, we are offered the chance to begin again. No impulsive reaction, no matter how intense, disqualifies us from God’s work of healing and transformation. Each new day, each new moment, is an opportunity to pause, respond, and grow.

Going Deeper

For more insights on the power of the Sacred Pause, you can explore these helpful resources:

Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom”: Discover how the Sacred Pause can help us break free from impulsive reactions.

Arthur Brooks in Conversation with Simon Sinek at the 92nd Street Y: Brooks and Sinek discuss the importance of pausing before reacting and how this practice fosters empathy and understanding.

Viktor Frankl’s Reflections: Explore Frankl’s insight on the space between stimulus and response, where our growth and freedom lie.

John Gottman’s Four Horsemen: Learn more about the damaging patterns that arise from reactive, emotionally charged behavior.

Sterling Severns Bible Study, Rule of Life Together, Spiritual Disciplines

Brown Bag Bible Study – Tuesdays at Noon (EST) on Zoom

Kicking off a new season with a new format on September 24!

We’re excited to launch the fall season of Brown Bag Bible Study on Tuesday, September 24, and invite you to join us! Whether you’ve been a part of this group for years or are considering joining for the first time, now is a great time to jump in as we introduce a new format that expands our circle and keeps the conversation meaningful in a shorter time frame.


What to Expect
We meet every Tuesday at Noon (EST) via Zoom. The space opens at 11:30 a.m. for casual conversation, and our study begins promptly at 12:00 p.m., wrapping up by 1:00 p.m.—perfect for anyone’s lunch break! Bring your lunch (hence the name “Brown Bag”) and join the conversation.

Our focus is on reflecting together on the previous Sunday’s sermon. A brief summary and discussion questions will be available on our website beforehand, so you can come prepared if you like, but everyone is welcome to join whether or not you’ve had a chance to review. Pastor Sterling Severns will guide the conversation, but it’s a time for shared discussion, where everyone’s perspective is valued.

“Perhaps the secret of living well is not in having all the answers, but in pursuing unanswerable questions in good company.”

– Rachel Naomi Remen


Who’s Invited?
This study is open to everyone—and now more than ever, we hope to expand our community. It’s a multi-generational space where folks of all ages and backgrounds are welcome. Whether you’re local, out of state, or even abroad, feel free to invite friends, family, or co-workers to join this welcoming conversation.


How to Join
Visit www.tbcrichmond.org for the Zoom link, sermon summaries, and reflection questions. For any questions, feel free to reach out to Pastor Sterling at pastor@tbcrichmond.org.

Whether you’re joining from close by or far away, bring your curiosity and an open heart. We’re excited for this new season and we look forward to seeing you on Tuesdays at Noon!

Sterling Severns Devotional

If a Tree Falls in the Northside

I’ve always had a thing for trees. Ask me about the places I’ve lived, and eventually, I’ll tell you about a tree I loved. One tree, in particular, stood sentinel over the home where we raised our children on the northside of Richmond, Virginia. Perhaps it’s my favorite.

We welcomed the shade it provided over three-quarters of the house for three-quarters of almost every year we lived there. In autumn, it blazed a shade of yellow that I’ll struggle to describe for the rest of my days. That tree was a constant presence during a time when everything else in our lives spun in constant motion.

I remember a contractor once telling me that the tree’s canopy probably cut our electric bill in half. Our old house, with its century-old glass windows and lack of insulation, was far from energy efficient, and money was really tight back then. At the time, I was simply grateful for the way the tree’s shade eased some of the financial burden. These days, gratitude sparks more imagination. I place the tree in a circle, of innumerable angel investors, funding diapers-in-bulk, gymnastics classes, car repairs, Lego sets, rare getaways with Laura, and so much more.

So many of our children’s birthday parties took place under that tree. Candles on cakes marked another year around the sun, while tree rings recorded the passage of time. The vast majority of the first decade of sermons I preached were written and memorized beneath its branches. The pressure of weekly deadlines at the pulpit was difficult for me, an insecure writer. I suppose the sheer size and longevity of the tree helped put things into perspective.

And then there were those autumn days. The kids would disappear into gigantic piles we’d just raked together, emerging with pieces of leaves tangled in their hair. I love that tree for so many reasons.

The early diagnosis came as an afterthought from someone in passing, “Your tree looks like it’s struggling.” Soon thereafter the arborist delivered the blow, “Your tree is dead and needs to come down.” The second expert was more direct: “Take it down before it crushes your house or hurts a child.”

It took some time to absorb, and even more time to wrestle with the guilt. It took less than two hours to take down a tree that had taken 200 years to grow. Memories of it always evoke sadness and gratitude for me.

In the first half of my life, in those years we were raising our children, I would have attempted to deny or eradicate the sadness. But here’s the thing, I’m discovering the gift of embracing the hard stuff, because it appears that this is where we eventually find the best stuff.

It’s “joy coming in the morning”

It’s “Friday, but Sunday’s coming”

It’s “there’s a crack in everything, that’s where the light gets in”

It’s “inconsolable longing”

It’s “the worst thing is never the last thing”

It’s the wisdom of the every-day saints gone before us.

It’s the suffering servant walking beside us.

It’s the path to peace which, in the gift of time, transforms us into peacemakers.

The day the tree was felled, a clearing appeared in the very place the canopy once stood. I didn’t see it then. I see it now.

The rain came down, sunlight shone through, and the soil, nourished in the very place where that old tree, and the others before it, once towered over, absorbed the gift, and, in the gift of time, the seedling grew.

Lucy Maud Montgomery says, “I am sure I could not have been more than four years old when I first consciously took note of the trees that watched over me.”

Take note, friends. God watches over all of us. Yes, many of us knew it before but now, after what we’ve been through and what some are going through, we will know this gladness more fully and be grateful for it. For all of it.

May the peace of Christ be with you.

Rev. Sterling W. Severns

Pastor

Sterling Severns Church Business

What might God do with the dust of our fallen structures?

In light of last week’s headline, World Health Organization declaring an end to COVID-19 as a global health emergency

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A word of encouragement to those (re)building, (re)viving, (re)missioning, and (re)forming institutions

All humans long for stability. Throughout time, Societies have built structures to protect stability. Call it covid, call it chaos, there’s been a whole lotta shakin’ goin’ on. Rigid structures don’t tend to fare well when the ground starts shaking. No structure is meant to last forever and yet when history circles back around we’re surprised by its arrival. Anything we carve or build out of rock, bricks, steel, or glass, eventually falls. Travel to Greece, Rome, the site of the former World Trade Center in NYC, or, (dare I say it) down a long stretch of Monument Avenue in Richmond, Va, historical structures eventually and always buckle under the pressure of the passage of time.

Most any group of people that find themselves finally tasting the “good life” naturally want to build a structure that can maintain, expand, and protect that way of life (aka stability). Think about the destructive cycles that spin chaos into the world from there. If building, maintaining, expanding, and protecting our “good life” requires the diminishing, disqualifying or destruction of the lives of others, expect chaos and prepare to choke on the dust of fallen idols, fortresses, and structures.

I believe God is refashioning us, not only out of the dust of our fallen idols, fortresses, and structures, but also out of the dust being stirred up by the beautiful feet of those walking beside “God with Us”

There’s a moment in the Bible when the disciples of Jesus find themselves awestruck by the Temple structure,“Look, Teacher, what wonderful stones and what a wonderful structure!” Jesus responds, “Do you see these great buildings? There will not be left here one stone upon another that will not be thrown down.” The temple is supposed to be the most stable place on earth, the one place where God’s finger touches the world, therefore the one place chaos can’t possibly exist.

Later in the story, those that arrested Jesus justify their actions based on the audacity of Jesus bringing chaos, the equivalent of kryptonite, into the temple. He doesn’t help his case when he predicts the temple’s destruction or in claiming he will rebuild the temple in three days. To add insult to injury, he claims the new Temple won’t be confined by geography or any other lines we might draw in the sand. No-one-corner of the world will be able to claim this One as their own. This One, is meant to travel. This One is a throwback to the original design. Anyone with institutional memory might call him “Tabernacle”, but most of his followers call him Savior.

Church, I know we’re all longing for stability, it’s natural to do so, especially in our grieving. I want you to know that I join you in deep grieving. So much more, I want you to know that we worship a God that brings order out of Chaos.

Any version of life, built upon a structure that diminishes the potential for thriving in the lives of others, cannot be attributed to the goodness of God.

YHWH didn’t fashion us out of metaphorical dust, breathe air into our lungs, and put us on our feet, only for us to create our own versions of the “good life”. Any version of life, built upon a structure that diminishes the potential for thriving in the lives of others, cannot be attributed to the goodness of God. Any version of the “good life” that leads someone into isolation, separation, or even relational annihilation is a cheap counterfeit. God is good…all of the time. The good life Christ offers is the real deal….the Way, the Truth, and The Life. Walk in the knowledge that we follow a Savior that can take all of the fallenness, brokenness, and complexities of the stories of the past and present, all of the unintentional chaos we’ve unleashed into the world, and somehow bring profound goodness through it. Know that God can, and will, make ALL things for good.

As we move out of this global pandemic, it will be critical for us to understand that it’s not our job to rebuild our temples. God already did that, three days after his son was crucified. The news gets even better. The resurrected Savior is inviting us to tabernacle with him right smack into the middle of the chaos. He’s inviting us to join the search party for those who have stumbled into, or were pushed into, lostness and loneliness. He’s inviting us to join him in the reclamation of the abandoned, to participate in the healing of the brokenhearted, and even in the resuscitation of the hearts of the presumed “righteous”.

In this very moment, I believe God is refashioning us, not only out of the dust of our fallen idols, fortresses, and structures, but also out of the dust being stirred up by the beautiful feet of those walking beside “God with Us”. It’s an invitation to breathe again. It’s an invitation to life again. It’s the invitation of a lifetime!

Rev. Sterling W. Severns, Pastor

  • This is an adaptation of something first written in January 2022.

Sterling Severns Church Business

A Word From Our Pastor……..

Good news. Challenging News. Great News. 

Earlier this fall the youth group kicked off a new weekly program with high aspirations and minimal fuel to make the engine “go”.  Long story short, after a couple of weeks of experimentation, it became pretty clear the most recent reboot of our youth program isn’t sufficient.  

WE MAKE THE ROAD BY WALKING.

Good News: 

God is doing something exciting in our experimentation and intentionality. We’re feeling encouraged to see our students integrating into the specific spaces of belonging we’re building for intergenerational Discipleship. We’re seeing God at work in and through the lives of those participating in Community Ministry (Saturdays), Dinner Church (Wednesday evenings), and Woven (Sunday mornings). God is bearing fruit in the deliberateness of our relationship building, through the continuity and deliberateness in our holy conversations. 

Challenging News: 

1) The identified need and desires we’re seeing in our younger youth are radically different from what we’re seeing and hearing from our older youth. This has always been true AND there is a palpable and definitive tension unique to the moment. 

2) The vast majority of the adults in our congregation, including many parents of our children and youth, do not express feeling called or remotely equipped to disciple children, youth, or adults. 

3) We have not been able to identify a core group of adults to make a weekly investment in the intentional discipleship of children and youth. Yes, there are individuals but no core groups of adults. We have no reason to believe this will change anytime soon. 

4) Families with children/youth are in constant motion. It was true long before the pandemic began and it’s even more true now. We have no reason to believe the pace of life is going to slow down anytime soon. We have no reason to believe that “church” will ever be the center of family life again nor should we assume the church should be the center of family life again.  The road ahead doesn’t resemble the place we’ve come from. 

5) We can’t seem to put down the baggage of the past (discipleship as a program) which gives us little or no capacity in the embracing of discipleship as a deliberate form of relationship building with Christ at the center. 

6) The Church is adrift. We have not come together to identify our priorities and we can’t make critical decisions together until we discern our priorities together. 

None of us, myself included, saw the missional drifting when it first began; we can’t identify when it  actually began. We certainly didn’t make a conscious decision to drift. Let’s be clear, no parent, leader, partner, community or organization drifts away from purpose….. on purpose. When we drift, and all of us do, we don’t usually know it’s happening. Maybe it begins when we get ahead of ourselves or a little full of ourselves? Maybe it happens when the tired sets in?  Maybe it happens when we get scared or overwhelmed? Maybe it happens when grief claims our focus? For whatever reason, we’re all prone to gently drift asleep at the wheel. If only the awakening would be so gentle. 

For the record, we have not come together to make a collective decision to radically change course and nobody has deliberately sabotaged our vessel.  We fell asleep at the helm and we’ve been awakened by a crisis. 

1) We didn’t see the need to recommit to our priorities, or discern new priorities during our chapters of thriving. 

2) The lack of seeing the need to clarify our priorities gave each of us, individually and as little groups, silent permission to determine our own priorities. 

3) A church full of individuals, boards, official and unofficial committees, each determining their own priorities, is a church adrift.

4) The wake-up call continues to be painful. 

The most obvious proof of our missional drift is our lack deliberate walking with children, youth, and their families. Judy, April, a couple of lay leaders, and myself are not able to do this on the church’s behalf. As it relates to ministry with children, youth, and their families, we must clarify what we’re trying to accomplish. We must receive the resources God is providing for the purpose of equipping. We must embrace our commission to make Disciples.  

Great news:

1) The leaders of the church are actively creating a plan to bring all of us together so that we can actively discern what God wants us to prioritize. Your voice is needed. More importantly, your listening heart and ears are needed!  Mark your calendars for a church-wide spiritual renewal weekend, January 13-15, 2023  and pray for our leaders as they help prepare the soil. 

2) In the meantime, as it relates to children, youth, and their families, we’re creating new spaces for you to make an immediate investment. The table you choose to sit at, the attitude you arrive with, your motive for participating, the risk you take in sharing, your gentle listening, makes more difference than you know. 

3) We don’t have to succumb to either/or thinking.  It is entirely possible to remain a committed member of a class/group AND also participate in intergenerational spaces of belonging.  Venturing out of your regular class/group, once a month, is healthy and undergirds the priesthood of all believers. What a gift it will be to return to your group the following week, to testify in what God is doing in the life of your church.  We urge you to carve out time, at least once a month, to participate in in one of our new spaces of belonging (Sunday mornings, Wednesday evenings, and/or Saturdays)

3) Whoever said that what God wants is for any of us to put church at the center of our lives? Jesus certainly never said that. He speaks of himself as God’s Temple, continually moving in the neighborhood.  God wants us to put Christ at the center of our the totality of our lives. What a tremendous opportunity we’ve been given to help families learn to disciple one another so they might share God’s love with those they are actually “doing life with”… on the sidelines of sports fields, on field trips, at work, and all of the gazillion places they find themselves on any given day.

5) And then there’s this…… best news ever…..God is with us AND for us. Drift is inevitable AND God is faithful.  We may have wandered but the Spirit guides. The crisis we’ve brought on ourselves in missional drift brings opportunity for Jesus to help us find our way again.  Our intentional walking in these last two months of the calendar year could very well determine whether or not we thrive in the year that follows. 

We have some amazing kids in the life of this church. Their parents, surrogate parents, and grandparents are also pretty amazing. Don’t even get me started on the newcomers that have only recently found an home in our little corner of the world. Each and every one of us, a child of God, full of holy potential, yet-to-be-discovered wonder, and renewed purpose. Each and every one of us with a part to play.  

We make the road by walking.

Yours in Christ, 
Sterling
Sterling W. Severns, Pastor

Sterling Severns Church Business

Leadership (2022): Invitation and Challenge

Over the next couple of weeks, the congregation will receive two ballots and 2-3 specific presentations:

BALLOTS = votes on leadership for 2022 and budget for the first half of 2022.

PRESENTATIONS = exploration of the role of Deacon Ministry, exploration of staff structure and possibly a third presentation from building and grounds.

This video provides a helpful primer for discernment.

Sterling Severns Church Business

COME AND SEE: Last Program has concluded. If you missed the programs or want to watch again, please click the links below for the recordings.

These days, so many of us find ourselves looking into the mirror with questions about about our identify, our allegiances, and our belief systems. We’re trying to figure out where we fit into the world and, how we’re supposed to guide the next generation in doing the same. Most of us are challenging the assumptions we’ve previously made of ourselves, the institutions we have called “home,” and oversimplified presumptions about the stories of those that have come before us.

A couple of Sundays ago, Braxton Kemp joined Sterling at the “pulpit,” to share a conversational sermon about blind spots and a mutual longing to see more clearly. 

What a gift it has been to discover something in the world that feels life-giving, as opposed to the familiar weariness and loneliness that so many of us have grown accustomed to in the pandemic.

Here is the recording from the first Come And See on October 20.

Here is the recording from the second Come And See on October 27.

Here is the recording from the third Come And See on November 3.

Here is the recording from the fourth and final Come And See on November 10.

Seeing (again) is life abundant (again).

In October 2021, a small handful of us began a holy conversation, some us physically present in sanctuary at Tabernacle Baptist Church in RVA and others by way of zoom.  As we’ve continued the conversation, some others have joined in and others have stepped out. Each week, those who make a conscious decision to show up continue the conversation and whoever shows up the following week does the same.

  • The conversation begins at at 7 p.m. sharp (EST) and concludes no later than 9 p.m. (EST).

 It’s a beautiful conversation.

It’s a difficult conversation.

It’s a life giving conversation.

If you are unable to attend in person, join us virtually on Zoom.

THE DETAILS. THE WARNING LABEL.

This isn’t a space for spectating.

This is an engaged space where sharing will be the norm. We don’t intend on asking for deep levels of vulnerable sharing in this space. Anyone looking for a more vulnerable space is encouraged to invite some folks to join you, informally, in the hours or days that follow. We’ll be more than happy to provide some helpful questions to go deeper together.

In turn, this isn’t a space for multi-tasking. 

Virtual and “In Person” participants are expected to be fully present from the moment they step into the space until the moment we say “amen” and step out of the space. If you don’t feel you can commit to full presence, we ask that you wait to join us until you can do so. The only devices that should be “on” during the conversation are those you are using to participate in the conversation. If you can’t make the commitment to fully engage, on any given Wednesday, it’s ok. Work and school deadlines happen. Stress at home happens. Surprises happen. Rest and retreat should happen. Whatever the reason for needing to step out of the conversation, do so with full blessing. Watch the recordings and jump back in when you are ready to be fully present in the space again.

******One caveat here: Some of us struggle with attention issues. If crocheting, knitting, or any form of quiet fidgeting helps you to focus…..by all means fidget away 🙂

This isn’t a space where weekly attendance is expected.

It’s ok if you join us one week and miss the next three. The recordings will be invaluable in preparing you to step back into the space the next go around.  

FYI: There are other spaces where smaller groups of 5-12 people, each with unique covenants, lean into vulnerable sharing and invited accountability. Weekly commitment is an expectation in these spaces as it’s critical in the building and keeping of trust. Should you find yourself looking for that kind of space, reach out to one of the leaders and we’ll go from there.

The conversation isn’t livestreamed but the recording is shared on the internet.

The invitation to be fully present doesn’t presume full disclosure. This is a public space by design. Please be mindful that anything you share in the conversation is shared on the internet. It’s really important for us to make this space hospitable and accessible to anyone that longs for connection. If you’re seeking to go deeper, share more vulnerably, or share more of the story, we will be more than happy to create a safe space for you to do so.

This as a space where simple answers to complex questions will be rejected.

You should expect to leave the space with some conviction. If we’re going to expect God to receive our honest questions, we should expect God to have some questions for us to consider. This is a space where all questions will be welcomed.

We’re going to lean into exploration of words that most of the western world have little or no use for.

Examples of these words might include: discipleship, mission, sin, evangelism, heaven, hell, etc. If you aren’t familiar with the host church, you might assume that you already know how we’re going define those words. We encourage you to join us in placing aside the assumptions about any one person or group represented in the room.

We will also explore phrases and words that tend to shut conversations down (e.g. white privilege, idolatry, pretty much any word that ends with “…..ism, etc.” If this is going to be an honest conversation, one that leans in holy wonder and expresses a deep longing for transformation, we need to be open to complexity and honest about our blind spots. In Christ, seeing (again) is life abundant (again). Limiting our vocabulary and arriving with preconceived assumptions, will only limit the potential for seeing differently.

This is a space hosted by a local church but created for the Universal Church. 

Whereas, Tabernacle Baptist Church is hosting the space, the conversation is so much bigger than the small congregation that has made a home at the corner Grove and Meadow in Richmond, Virginia. God is guiding all of us to make a road by walking together. Conversational leaders, and conversational partners (FYI – that’s you), will come from multiple contexts, all with unique world views and life experiences. Long story short, the invitation to participate in the conversation goes well beyond any one local church and we’re going to prioritize the inclusion of diverse voices and perspectives in this space. 

This space is designated as “Sanctuary” for all.

Sanctuary is a space where all are made welcome, where each and every one of God’s children come to understand that we are loved as we were made, in all of our beautiful messy complexity. Sanctuary is an active space of hospitality AND transformation alike. Transformation means, “come as you are with the assumption that Christ loves us too much to leave us as we are.”

Expect to be welcomed fully. Expect to be challenged fully.

This isn’t a space for children.

While all adults and youth are invited to join us, it doesn’t mean that everyone should join us. This is a space set aside for honest/messy story sharing, full expression of doubts, wide open questioning, and the testifying to revealed wonder along the way. We’re going to lean into the tension that surfaces and we’re going to encourage the embracing of holy mystery. Each of us will need to determine our level of comfort in stepping into this space and each parent needs to determine if their teenager is ready for a conversation with limited boundaries. 

Like us, you’re probably wondering about what needs to be made available for children and youth not-yet-ready for this kind of conversation. A group of leaders are actively engaged in discernment about the next right step in the spiritual and emotional formation of our children and youth. Expect news soon.  Remember, the first critical step in the formation of children and youth begins with the formation of the adults that will lead them.

So there you have it. You’ve been invited and warned 🙂

We really would love for any teenagers and/or adults to join us. It is really important that any and all conversational partners honor the intent of the space.

Our first weekly gathering will take place on Wednesday, October 20, 2021. We will start at 7 p.m. sharp and wrap up no later than 9 p.m.

Show up in person at 1925 Grove Avenue, Richmond, VA 23220 OR virtually.

If you’re driving, you can park for free in the pay lot on Meadow or park in the alley parking lot and/or blacktop behind the building.

www.tbcrichmond.org